Welcome to my Critter Cafe review. We were not given a review code for this title.
Critter Cafe is a creature collection-X-business sim about running your own boutique cafe with the help of an assortment of furry friends. The graphics are adorable, the main character and cafe are uber-customizable—plus, day-to-day business is punctuated by intriguing, puzzle-y mazes you have to cross in order to rescue each new critter. Once you adopt a new little buddy, you can meet them in the sanctuary for grooming, play, and snack time. It’s colorful, cute, and easy to learn and play.
The first thing you will realize about Critter Cafe (as I surely did) was how flexible and fun the character creation is. You don’t need to unlock styles or colors, it’s all available to you right off the bat and you can access it as often as you want by interacting with the coat rack by the front door. There are a variety of skin tones, hair styles, and outfits, and you can change them whenever you want throughout your game experience.
The cafe starts with a point-and-click clean-up and decorating task, and while you do have quite an assortment of furnishings and decor to choose from, you will also unlock more as the game goes on. Decor doesn’t have a huge bearing on the goings-on at the cafe, but it can be fun to feel your vibe regardless. Not only do you have the typical accoutrement of a coffee-service establishment, but you will have an assortment of cute pet beds, cat trees, and the like, which adds such a sweet touch.
Running the cafe is pretty simple: take your guests’ orders, with each order leading to a different minigame. There are timing games (press or release a button at the right time), rhythm games (tap the right buttons in order), and memory games (remember the order items). There is slight time-sensitivity around taking orders before folks leave, but otherwise it’s near impossible to fail. Even if you perform poorly at every order, the only consequence is getting fewer points during your end-of-the day scorecard. And to be honest, that doesn’t seem to matter very much.
Let me explain: Sure, you get points to increase your cafe reputation and the affection level of each critter, but at the end of the day, that doesn’t get you anything. There is no currency earned, nothing to gain from having a better reputation, and nothing to build, buy, or upgrade. You serve your customers, gain superficial “points,” and then rinse and repeat.
I was a little disappointed, to be honest, but I can envision that this game was perhaps meant for a younger audience than I. The general grind of the cafe might be a cute, fun loop for kids age 7-13ish—especially with the critter collecting and character dress-up customization being something I can see players of that age group enjoying.
Between cafe craze days, you’ll receive mysterious letters that contain directions to various new critters. Trapped in a pocket dimension, you’ll be tasked with solving increasingly complex puzzles to rescue each one. The puzzles involve sliding blocks to create new paths, using tools to activate switches, catching a ride on floating platforms, using jump blocks to reach higher heights, and using all of the above in tandem to maneuver from the start of each maze to the end. At the finale, you’ll find a new critter, who you can take back to your ever-growing sanctuary.
And here’s where we run into a bit of an issue. Although the early puzzle are rated E for everyone, they slowly evolve to include some picky timing segments, some twisty solutions, and some frustrating mechanics. None of which would be a problem, except for the fact that I would loosely rank the difficulty of the later puzzles for ages 12-16. So you can start to see the issue here. There is a very small window of players I can confidently recommend this game too. It’s for a younger crowd, no problem; but it’s also for a not-too-easily-frustrated crowd. So, not that young, then.
Even if we take ages out of it, there is a very niche audience that will get enough out of the bare bones cafe management mechanics without wanting more—a currency system, failures that actually matter, or even (bare minimum) critters that tangibly assist in the cafe somehow. Carry and deliver a drink instead of just getting in my way, please!
There’s not much to speak of story-wise, either. Someone is sending you mysterious letters encouraging you to rescue and adopt critters lost across different pocket dimensions. But other than waiting for the big reveal around who is sending you these letters, there isn’t a much of a plotline to follow. None of the NPCs in the cafe or in the neighborhoods around it have names or dialogue. The creatures don’t help with cafe activities or have any sort of personality. The cafe doesn’t grow or change in meaningful way. It all feels very vacant and vapid.
Critter Cafe won me over with their advertising, but lost me quickly with the deeply repetitive gameplay. Though cute and colorful—and delightfully serotonin-chic—within 5 hours of playtime, I was craving some sort of diversity. There wasn’t enough to sink my teeth into, and I struggle to envision for whom the game was intended. What was the target market? What were their comp titles? From the outside, it seemed so perfect for cozy gamers. But I guess, like books, you shouldn’t judge a game by it’s cover.
Summary
Here’s a quick summary of the main points of my Critter Cafe review, for those who don’t have time to read a whole page when there is so much good trash TV out there right now!
Pros
- Tons of character & cafe customization options
- Cute critters and character models
- Easy to learn and play
Cons
- Very repetitive gameplay loop after a short amount of playtime
- There aren’t any consequences for failure
- The cafe lacks a sense of satisfying upward progression
In Critter Cafe, players run a customizable cafe with the help of adorable critters rescued through simple puzzles and mazes. It boasts flexible character creation, colorful graphics, and Zelda-lite puzzle rooms. However, the game lacks meaningful progression or consequences, making it feel quickly repetitive. While the critters can be groomed and played with in a sanctuary, they don’t assist with cafe tasks or have distinct personalities, and the lack of story depth or currency systems limits engagement.
I would recommend gamers who are interested in Critter Cafe wait until a significant sale before buying it. Say, $10 or less for 5ish hours of mindless fun before it starts to overstay it’s welcome.
Have you played Critter Cafe? Let me know your thoughts in the comments.
Stay cozy, gamers!